Who Has Permission to Speak Into You?

A Devotional Testimony: Learning to Trust God in My Wilderness

There was a season in my life when I experienced homelessness. It was one of the most painful, lonely, and humbling journeys I’ve ever walked. I prayed, cried, questioned God, and wondered why life seemed so difficult when I was trying to hold on to my faith.

During that time, I struggled with resentment toward the church. I believed that because I was a believer, someone would surely step in and rescue me. I expected the church, my friends, or even my family to have the answers or provide the help I desperately needed. When things didn’t happen the way I expected, disappointment turned into hurt, and hurt turned into resentment.

But God lovingly began to change my heart.

He revealed that while people can be His hands and feet, my foundation could never be built on people. In that season, God wasn’t asking me to place my trust in the church, my friends, or my family. He was asking me to trust Him.

There were lessons He wanted to teach me that no one else could teach. There was a deeper dependence He wanted to develop in me that no human being could provide. Sometimes God allows us to walk through a wilderness so we discover that His presence is enough, even when every earthly resource seems unavailable.

As Proverbs 3:5–6 reminds us:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

It wasn’t easy. There were days I wanted to give up. There were moments when I wondered if God saw me at all. Yet through every hardship, He sustained me. Looking back now, I realize He never left me—not for a single moment.

As I continued to trust Him, God began answering prayers in ways I never imagined. He blessed me with a home and restored my hope. He allowed me to continue pursuing the goals He placed on my heart. The dreams He gave me didn’t disappear because of my struggles—they were being prepared through them.

God also answered one of the deepest prayers of my heart.

I stopped praying for just anyone and began praying specifically for the man God had for me. I asked for a healthy, Christ-centered relationship. I prayed for a God-fearing man who would love God first, cherish me wholeheartedly, and value family. I trusted that God’s timing would be perfect.

In His perfect timing, He answered that prayer. I fell in love and found a partner who reflects the qualities I had faithfully prayed for—a relationship rooted in faith, love, commitment, and a shared desire to honor God. That blessing reminded me that when we surrender our desires to God, He knows exactly how to fulfill them in His perfect way.

Today, my perspective has completely changed. I no longer measure God’s faithfulness by what people do or don’t do for me. I measure it by His promises, because His promises never fail. I have learned to appreciate the church while understanding that no person can take the place of God. People may disappoint us because they are human, but God remains faithful.

Now I am on a new journey—one of continuing to serve God with a grateful heart. I know my testimony isn’t just about where I’ve been; it’s about what God has done. Every challenge, every tear, every unanswered question was shaping me into the woman He called me to be.

If you’re in a season where you feel forgotten, overlooked, or disappointed by people, I encourage you not to let your pain become your identity. Don’t allow disappointment to steal your faith. Keep trusting God. He sees every tear, hears every prayer, and knows every need.

My wilderness was never the end of my story. It became the place where my trust in God was strengthened, my faith was refined, and my testimony was born.

Today, I stand as living proof that God still provides. God still restores. God still answers prayers. God still opens doors. And God is still writing beautiful stories for those who choose to trust Him.

To God be all the glory.
Amen

I used to think God didn't have time for the "small" things, so I rarely brought everyday decisions before Him. Then one day my youngest son asked why he couldn't have a girlfriend before turning sixteen. My first response was, "Because I said so." Later, God gently convicted me: Ask him what a girlfriend means to him. I apologized and asked. His answer was simple—playing together at recess and sitting together at lunch. What could have created confusion became connection. God taught me that His wisdom is for the small moments, because those moments often shape hearts the most.